Surviving the Plan - 4

Plans are for the patient

–Beginning Expressive Narration of Recording 30–

Recording 30 begins. Anna is back with ‘Harrison.’ Water exists at her side. It has clearly been ingested in part. Progress and explanation on the varieties of ‘right’ has yet to be explained by the mortal, blasphemous Human.

It soon does when she opens her mouth and begins speaking: “So that just searches if the title is like that, but we want to be a little bit more vague with it. The word can be anywhere in the title. Beginning or end, whatever. So we use these.” She types it out, reworking the entire Clojure function.

(let [input (str "%" input "%")]
  (korma/exec-raw ["SELECT * from posts where title like ?" [input]] :results))

“The percent sign is a wildcard search thing,” Anna explains. “It looks for the pattern of ‘input’ throughout the title.”

“That is powerful,” Lapadj says softly. “For something of a mundane Human making.” Sarela cackles, invisible as always.

Grapefruit, to the side, makes a humming noise. “It is pretty nifty.”

“You only think that because it falls securely under your mundane domain,” Sarela says. “You are more of a Human God than an Empirian one. The irony is that the Humans do not worship you are even know that you exist. Much like the Empire.” She laughs. “How Empirian of them.”

“Very Empirian,” Grapefruit says. She makes a little sighing noise.

Meanwhile, the tests pass at Anna’s code. Lapadj humphs.

“We need to write more tests, I think,” Anna says. “To make sure that is searching the entire phrase, you know.”

“I do,” Lapadj most certainly lies. He takes the keyboard and starts copy and pasting the existing test and creates new tests with different titles and different inputs that would match or not match. At the end of his coding stint, he saves the file and watches the test pass on another screen. “Is that it?”

“I think so.” She nods.

“I will do the committing and pushing, if you do not mind,” Lapadj says. He types in git add . , git commit with a relevant message, and then git push. All before Anna has even responded.

“Ugh, sure.”

“Is there anything else to do right now?” Lapadj asks.

“Um. We have some more stuff on the stack but-“

“I am going to leave early,” he states abruptly. “Something has come up and I need to deal with it. I shall see you tomorrow.”

“Uh. Okay. I, ugh, hope you have a good time with whatever is going on,” Anna sputters out as he rises out of his seat.

“So bold, Lapadj,” Sarela coos, “so bold.”

“That is why I shall win,” Lapadj says with confidence, again using the special word of ‘shall’.

Grapefruit vibrates as he picks her up. “Stop using shall. I am worried it will make you lose.”

“I do not need to do anything to lose. That is within my power,” Lapadj says. He waves to Anna as he exits the building swiftly. “As is my victory over Mark. I am going to consume his soul and it will be glorious.”

Sarela floats over to him. “Surely something to be made into a legend. Assuming it comes to pass. We will have it all on recording, no need to share.”

“End the recording, I need time to think and prepare,” Lapadj casually says and she immediately does so.

–Ending Expressive Narration of Recording 30–

I was going to say something about the Database of the Spine, but I felt the Spine would be offended by its mentioning.

Anyway, yeah, I gave up. I really want to write the next scene.